It's all in the mind? Transformation Part II

In another week’s time, everyone in the batch is going to be graduating from our teacher training. Time really flies… It has already been 4 months since I started waking early on weekends (even earlier than my usual work days!).
Besides getting used to the idea of not being able to sleep in anymore, the past 4 months’ has been a test of my willpower and determination. How many times in the earlier weeks of training have I chanted to myself inside that “I can’t do this, I can’t do this, I can’t do this…” Jump or hop 20 times? I couldn’t manage 5 times without feeling extremely drained and thighs burning. Handstand? My hips are nowhere near over my shoulder.
Master Paalu’s words of “don’t talk down on yourself, don’t doubt yourself” works wonders. Often, many things are self-explanatory and almost common sense, but a reminder is just what we need some times. Practice and all is coming indeed – one fine day many weeks later, I just randomly thought of having a go at that hop into handstand and it just happened. The body and mind is an amazing thing… some times, we just have to accept that there is nothing to figure out, it will do what you want when it is ready. Just keep practicing with no expectations.
Before starting on the 200hrs YTT, I thought I was kind of “blessed” with a bit of flexibility but that didn’t get me very far because they say when you are flexible, you tend to depend a lot on your flexibility and the muscles are not engaged. It is true. My alignment was shabby, constantly dumping weight into my lower back, and I had no strength whatsoever. Couldn’t even do a chaturanga L
It seems like I have gained a bit of strength in my arms over the last few months. But more than that, it occurred to me that true strength lies in the mind, the heart and believing in the practice. It was only when I let go of certain perceptions, expectations and ego when I actually saw progress. It is the biggest lesson that I’ve learnt during YTT and I trust that it will take me to places I want to be as a person both on and off the mat.
Angeline Chia
YTT 200hrs weekend