Eight years ago, I injured
my left knee. I can’t recall what exactly I was doing but I’m certain it was
nothing important or strenuous. I felt a sharp pain every time I landed my foot
on the floor of whenever I bent my left knee. It felt like someone was driving
a thin metal-cold knife right under the knee bone. But a few months passed and
my knee was back to normal.
Two years ago, the same
thing happened. On a random day, I bent down from a standing position into a
squat to pick up some things on the floor, and the same sharp pain came back. I
couldn’t bend my knee without feeling the invisible thin knife slicing through
the joint. And this time, my entire knee began to swell. Climbing a flight of
stairs was a struggle. Lifting heavy luggage was a struggle.
By this second bout of injury, I was already active in my Yoga practice. But the injury made it excruciating to do simple poses like chair pose. And after every practice, my knee would swell and I had to take a few days rest so it could partially (no fully) recover.
Unlike the first time, the pain had no plans of leaving me. Three, four months had passed and the trauma on my left knee remained. My movements had severely been limited.
When I attended Yoga classes, I couldn’t perform any asana that involved kneeling or the lotus position. Doing cat and cow and then moving into a low lunge was a NIGHTMARE.
My knee was stiff but its insides felt so tender. Whenever I pushed my knee beyond its limit, at the end of the class I always got the feeling that my lower leg was about to fall off – like when you lift the drumstick off a whole roasted chicken, and the cartilage and skin begin to tear. All you need is to pull it towards you and the chicken leg comes right off.
And my Yoga teachers gave different pieces of advice like strengthen my thigh and avoid placing weight on my left leg. They also suggested Pilates to help strengthen my leg.
But, rather than strengthening my left leg, I developed uneven legs. I could barely stand on my left leg without support or without the pain searing through. So, I would place most of my weight on my right leg to compensate — my right leg basically became more macho than my left leg.
When I visited the rheumatologist,
he said I had early onset osteoarthritis. Because of two prior injuries, my
knee has decided to have an accelerated “wear and tear.” He also told me there
was nothing I could do about it other than to ensure I didn’t add to the progression.
I wasn’t supposed to do any running, jumping and mountain climbing.
I was only 29 then and I had an old person knee problem. I was horrified. And one of my biggest fears in that moment was that my knee condition would require me to take a step back from doing Yoga.
But instead of slowing down,
I decided this was a push towards the right direction. I took the diagnosis as
a sign that I needed to find a place and time where someone would teach me, specifically
and properly, how I could continue with my Yoga practice without my knee
holding me back. I wanted to find a way to excel in my practice despite having
a chronically injured body part.
That was when I decided to take the Yoga Teacher Training 200 course.
I had apprehensions; I was afraid my knee would act up and I would have to give up the course half way. Giving up the course was not a practical option for me since I was flying all the way from Philippines.
But lo and behold, our batch is in our last week of training and I am still in one piece. My left leg has gained strength over three weeks, which was possible because of three key aspects in the training:
- Daily asanas that were heavy on technique (which were really challenging on certain days but beneficial every step of the way)
- Knowledge of the muscular and joint system (I understood which thigh muscles to pull so that I could relieve the left knee of stress, pain and overextension)
- Awareness of the fact that Yoga can really be used for therapy.
An injury will come in different shapes and forms. It might be inevitable, especially as our physical bodies get older. But it should not stop you. Instead, it should inspire you to want to get better. An injury does not mean you have to stop Yoga; rather, it means you need to take a new approach to your practice. It might also mean the current way you treat your body is not proper or optimal, and that you need to seriously make a change; and giving more attention and taking on an educated approach to your Yoga practice is a great way to start.