OMG, you’ve got to be kidding me!
My heart pounded crazily when Master Paalu announced it to the whole class on the first day of the course. I would never ever thought I could do any inversions. I do not even know if I could pull off at the end of the course!
Standing on the head?
It just seemed impossible.. I freaked out and I
wanted to run away have second thoughts of coming back to the class the very next day! I don’t know the technique and was clueless how to go about performing it. I followed what other people were doing beside me, measuring elbows apart and forming a triangle base with my hands interlaced together. I tried to lift my super heavy legs up and fell pathetically. Next, I tried to hop them up, no luck. I sensed that my technique was not right and thought my neighbours were also facing the same difficulties as I did.
As I turned around, instead what I thought it might be, I saw a row of sexy legs hanging upside down in the air like a bat and I stuck out like a sore thumb, the only one not doing the headstand. My mind was racing and I started to question if this is right class for me? I thought it says on the advertisement that it was for beginners. Master Paalu said that his grandmother could do it at 80 years old, so what is stopping us from performing this asana?
On my attempt in doing this asana, I have sustained countless falls, cuts and bruises. Fear of falling, checked. Fear of cracking my teeth, checked. Fear of having spine/hand/leg whatever bodyparts I have injury, checked. Spotting the huge ugly bruise on both my knees, Mom asked – I don’t understand why are you paying to bring suffering to yourself! I know she is saying it out of concern. I was in ambivalence. On one hand practice feels like torture, on the other hand the fire in me is unwilling to give up. I am grateful to fellow coursemates Cher, Grace and Lisa who had so patiently guided me in this quest.
On the day I managed to do a headstand, I cried with joy! =D May seem like an overreaction. You see, I am not physically strong and having no sports background, dance or any form of physical exercise except for running casually, performing the seemingly impossible headstand is definitely one of the defining moment for me in my life. Although it is not perfect, I never felt so accomplished especially when it comes to sports activity.
Take home message…
Break free from limiting thoughts. Your progress and growth is not built around the life of ease. As you go the edges of your limit, your edges will expand. The process of learning starts when you fall, so it’s okay to fall… safely. I have learnt that the body can be very resilient and the mind is stronger than you think. Keep believing in yourself, patience is key when performing asanas and enjoy the ride. Remember to smile, ok? =)
Veron. T July ’14 200 Hr Weekend TTC