Since I got a chance to write two blog about my yoga journey, I would like to tell two reasons of why I’ve decided to learn yoga at the age of 40.
I had a worst time of my life last year. Long story short, I lost my husband from his depression. Suddenly he left our marriage, job, Singapore and moved back to UK. I was left alone in abroad and didn’t know what to do.
I did my best not to be depressed but I was. So one of my best friends arranged me an amazing hypnotherapist and it actually worked and saved my life. However, starting my life from scratch, finding a job in Singapore wasn’t easy even though I was surrounded by my amazing friends. To take care of myself (I hated this word of ‘taking care of myself’ because it sounded such a beautiful word in such a horrible situation!), I started running, meditation and yoga-ish poses at home. Then I found a really nice small yoga studio in walking distance from my place. So decided to give it a try.
I loved the space instantly and I enjoyed the very first lesson. My teacher was very young but had such a pleasant manner and pretty smile. I was very envious and kind of jealous seeing this happy teacher. Then I was shocked how beautiful she was when she did the Suriya Namaskara A & B. She looked so light, effortless and it was like watching a short film. Instantly I remembered about my childhood dream of being a witch – I will write about it in my next blog – and got an urge to learn more about yoga.
That’s how I decided to sign up for 200H course. I wanted to feel happy, confident and light yet grounded. The course has been very tough and I was stressed from the difficulties of all the asanas, especially headstand. But to me, being able to do the headstand was one of the criteria to get close to a witch and I needed to do it though I was scared to death. After practicing two weeks, finally I was able to do it using a wall. However something unexpected thing happened; I couldn’t stop crying. It was as if all the emotions that put away at the hypnotherapy came out from my head like a salt & pepper shaker and my tears didn’t stop. One of the teacher told me that the hip opening exercise sometimes brings out the feeling. I felt like all my anger, jealous, sadness, loneliness, and fear towards my future were shook off.
I like headstand now. I still am not able to hold it for three minutes. However I have to do headstand everyday to feel the happiness of practicing yoga. I feel it alternated my life and put me back to myself. Every time I do headstand, it reminds me the moment I threw away the bad memory and swopped with the happy feeling. Also being upside down gives me a hope of maybe I can be a nice witch and be able to help people through yoga like it did to me.
My journey of yoga has just started but it has been happy and blessed. Without my teachers’ patience and my classmates’ smiles and encouragements, I wouldn’t have been able to finish this course.
Now I have a new dream. Yoga gave me a new direction of my life and I am very excited about it. Some of my friends asked me if I wished starting yoga when I was younger. Of course I do but I am hoping that maybe I can offer something unique to my future clients because of my age and experience. Let’s see how it goes…
Sanae Inada
200H YTTC Weekend
Jan 2015 to May 2015

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