I have been in the corporate world for more than 20 years. It has been a good 20 years as I have learnt many things and the most valuable thing is, some of my colleagues are now my closed friends. I have been fairly lucky at work (or I chose to see that I am lucky) and have been given many opportunities to try different things and move up the corporate ladder. I started a family in my 30s and children ‘took charge’ of my life for more than a decade. My life, my thoughts, my activities revolved around their needs. As I head towards the 50 years old milestone, with my children growing up, I start to think about me.
I started yoga some 15 years ago. Besides being a good workout, I enjoyed the session and felt happy and peaceful at the end of the class. I always feel proud of myself when I have managed to achieve the postures consistently. I stopped for a few years when my kids were little and resumed into more regular practice when they are a bit bigger.
I am no different from other working mums. I am busy with work, busy with the children’s homework and their endless logistics needs, doing marketing for groceries and when time permits, I squeeze in an hour of Korean drama. On top of that, I try to do a daily (if I can) yoga practice at home because it just saves me the time travelling to and fro the studio.
In the last couple of years, I start thinking what will I be doing in another 10 years. Where do I see myself in 10 years time? The answer to these questions has been consistent – I hope I will not be working in the corporate world full time after 10 years. However, I cannot be just leaving the corporate world when I am 50 without something to go to or do. So what should I be doing when I am 50 and what should I do to get myself ready?
I left school decades ago and skills/ interests that I used to be good at have long disappeared from me. In the last 20 years, I have not spent time to hone any skills to increase my employability.
After thinking about it and talking to others for 2 years, I have decided to do a YTT. I want to use it to deepen my practice and also to see for myself, if teaching yoga will be something that I really want to do.
I applied for a month of absence from my company. In the last week leading to the YTT, my brain started acting weird. It kept telling me not to do it. Thoughts like I may not be cut out to be a teacher, it will be a waste of time, my current job is good and I have been given many opportunities etc, were running in my head daily.
To be continued in Part 2… JT