Follow up from the first head stand

In my first blog , I expressed with great enthusiasm the fact that I had done my first EVER head stand and how excited I was to carry on and progress with it.
I am quite sad to report that I have not progressed further with it. Quite the opposite!!
I stopped doing all the asana where I have to put strain on my neck, I seem to have a nerve trapped, somewhere in my neck and it is causing two numb fingers in each hand.
It is quite frustrating to not be able to achieve the tasks that I set myself, that does not happen very often
I have to confront and accept my limitations but I have decided to concentrate and focus in what I can do instead of I what I cannot do. I now can hold my big toes while doing Padahastasana while , when I started the course I hardly could touch my carve.
Every day that I get up at 5.30 in the morning to attend the course it is a small victory and once the class starts and, every day, I can bend a little bit further, I gives me such a sense of achievement.
It’s not just the physical achievement but for me it is also very much the mental. I am learning so much about myself, I am learning how love myself a little more , not that I did not , I did , I truly believe if one does not love itself , no one will, but I am not sure how to express this , but maybe I am respecting myself a little more .
This course has turned me inside out , I am a very confident person , but there were times that I felt so lost and venerable , although , I must admit that those feeling were so strong when I could not do an asana , or when I did not have the answer for a particular question.
Then I realised that I had to be kinder to myself , I had to admit that I never had done yoga at this level and I am very inflexible, but there was no other way than forward. And now , on my almost 5th week of the course regardless of the outcome , my confidence is back and I thank all the Masters at Tirisula, for their help and persistence , ohh boy they have twisted and bended me in ways I never thought possible.
Carla Cavaco

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