Me, Myself & I

I have always been active, from a young age I ran, jumped, cartwheeled my way through my childhood never wanting to stop moving. That all stopped when one day whilst at gymnastics I didn’t land my backflip on the beam and fractured my coccyx. As I continued to grow my back got worse. Fractures occurred easily and discs moved. I tried to not let it stop me from an active lifestyle, as really that’s all I knew. The last few years have got worse for me and I have to accept that I will probably be on pain killers for the rest of my life.

 

One gloomy day whilst walking through Manchester’s northern quarter I saw a sign for Bikram yoga. I was captivated by the pictures and the thought of exercising in a warm room intrigued me. When I walked through the door, I saw the kind of girls that scared me. With their perfect bodies, being shown off by their tiny crop tops and hot pants, I sat at the back of the room in a baggy t-shirt and leggings. I continued to go and I realized that as the time went on I stopped looking at others in the mirror and concentrated on myself. My back had never felt better and I was improving every day. I realized that I didn’t need to impress anyone and in my own time, I shook off the baggy t-shirt and didn’t care if my love handles bulged over my leggings, I was comfortable in my own body.

 

I have gone through many changes in the last few years of my life. As an adult I haven’t lived in the same house for more than a year, my job and my situation just kept changing and the only thing that kept me grounded was exercise.

 

A few months ago I made the biggest decision of my life. I left my high flying career in fashion, my independence, my family and friends and moved to the other side of the world. I knew I needed something to keep my feet on the ground and again yoga was there for me. Moving abroad and not being able to work made me revert into myself. I was so outgoing and confident in London and felt that all melt away as soon as I landed in Singapore. My very successful partner took to his new job like a duck to water. He got on extremely well with his colleagues, and spent a lot of time socializing with them and his clients. Whilst desperately trying to set up my own business, I spent a lot of time on my own; and working from home doesn’t help you meet anyone! I felt like the days dragged and I didn’t have much of a purpose here. I needed yoga back in my life, and so spent one Sunday sussing out whether to come into the Tirisula studio or not. As soon as I walked in and the daylight hit me, I saw the spacious area in the middle of a bustling Arab street and knew it was for me. I signed up to the YTT 200 course immediately and felt confident that I had made the right decision. Knowing that soon I would have some structure in my life really inspired me and helped me to go out and meet people, network and push myself to set up the business that I have always wanted.

 

Now the YTT course is nearly over and I have such mixed feelings. I have loved having a routine again but trying to balance my business with the yoga has been difficult. I have longed to come home, have a nap and spend a few hours reading in the evening. In reality I have had to come home, get my designs made, meet clients, continue with my website and spend the evenings trying to get my name out there. I have never felt so exhausted in my whole life but I feel proud of what I have achieved. Again yoga has saved me – it has lit a fire in me to continue to develop myself, both on and off the mat.

 

Luisa Vass YTT 200 (week day)