Fear…Don’t let it win!

“By recognising that fear is part of the experience of moving forward, fear can slide into the back seat and you take that journey that you have been wishing to!”

This sentence is the ending to an article that I have just read online. How meaningful this sentence is!

I remembered how long I took to decide on taking up this course. I thought over and over again for the longest time…why? Because of fear. Fear that I might not even survive the first week of intensive physical practice, fear that I might have so many poses that I cannot do and I am the worst student in class, fear that ultimately I may not pass the tests and get the certificate and that my money will go to waste. Since young, fear sips into me very easily. I am afraid to take roller coasters, afraid to change job, afraid to make wrong decisions so on and so forth.

In this article, the writer encouraged the readers to not force or fight, and instead just notice what is actually coming up for you. He said “Take a few breaths to allow the fear mechanisms to stop whirling and notice what’s underneath. This is where creation happens. This is where you find nuggets about yourself.” Well said!

I let my fear take a backseat when I went up to Tirisula to register for this course in May. I told myself then, “What’s the worst that can happen? Failing the tests?” It will not cost my life and so here I am… I am now in my final week of this course. Throughout the course, there are definitely moments of fear…when I cannot do a pose, when I have to push myself upside down in a headstand, when I am not sure if my lesson plan is feasible and now in my final week, fear for failure in the tests. Despite these fears, I am very sure I have moved forward – physically, spiritually, mentally and emotionally. I feel more toned and stronger now. Whenever I face a difficult pose, I breathe and just do, and engage. Just don’t let fear win. I know the courage that I took to leave my job for this course is not something many people have, and for this, I applaud for myself. I hope to continue to bring this courage to whatever I dream to do in future. No one knows what the future is. We just do our best in the present and we move forward…

To those who wish to take the course, be it whether you are at a crossroad (not knowing what to do with your life), or you simply want to challenge yourself, DO IT! We only live once. Put all your fears aside and go through this new experience in this school. I made new friends, learnt new techniques, pushed myself beyond my perceived physical limits etc. I will not regret my choice.

-Jean-